It's two A.M. in my new home, this motel room
An ash tray full of lucky strikes
A half spent case of warm Bud Lite
Countin' regrets, fightin' back tears
Retracin' steps, gettin' no where

[Chorus]
Callin your name, it's a waste of my breath
There's no reachin' you across this cold and empty bed
Stirrin' up ashes, tryin' to find passion
Where there's no love left
It's like tryin to put smoke back in this cigarette

Come sunrise, guess I'll checkout and ditch this town
Put a few more miles between us
And keep driving till I finally mend my broken trust
Hangin' my hopes on highway signs
If I lie here, I'll loose my mind

[Chorus]
Callin your name, it's a waste of my breath
There's no reachin' you across this cold and empty bed
Stirrin' up ashes, tryin' to find passion
Where there's no love left
It's like tryin' to put smoke back in this cigarette

I may never know your reasons why
But someday I'm gonna see the good in your goodbye

Callin your name, it's a waste of my breath
There's no reachin' you across this empty bed
Stirrin' up ashes, tryin' to find passion
Where there's no love left
It's like tryin to put smoke back in this cigarette
__________________________________________________

I woke up today in London
As the plane was touching down
And all I could think about was Monday
When maybe I’d be back around
If this keeps me away much longer
I don’t know what I would do
You got to understand it’s a hard life,
that I’m going through

And when the night falls in around me
And I don’t think I’ll make it through
Ill use your light to guide the way
Cuz all I think about is you

L A is getting kind of crazy
And New York is getting kind of cold
I keep my head from getting lazy
I just can’t wait to get back home

And all these days I spend away
Ill make up for this I swear
I need your love to hold me up
When it’s all to much to bear

And when the night falls in around me
And I don’t think I’ll make it through
Ill use your light to guide the way
Cuz all I think about is you

And all these days I spend away
Ill make up for this I swear
I need your love to hold me up
When it’s all to much to bear

And when the night falls in around me
And I don’t think I’ll make it through
Ill use your light to guide the way

Cuz all I think about is you
________________________________________________________

Countin' regrets, fightin' back tears
Retracin' steps, gettin' no where - Sometimes I feel as if my mind is infested. Infested so heavily with a plague that can't help but make me feel as if I'm being eaten alive by my own thoughts. I tend not to regret things, but the things I do regret, are rather haunting, and are enough to tear me apart. And as they race through my mind, I have to choke back the tears..and remember I'm responsible for my actions..and those regrets...those situations...are in the past..But sadly, that's not always a comfort enough. I feel as if my mind is a broken record, as it keeps repeating and glitching. Not constantly, but sometimes...and sometimes..that amount of time, can be such a hinderance to what I really want to think about/do.

There's no reachin' you across this cold and empty bed- When I wake...from another terrifying dream, and as I gasp to catch my breath, my eyes still half closed...I sometimes reach for you...hoping you'll be there..to calm me...to make the fear disappear...But i understand. It's not possible right now. It's a silly little thing I do. But it's a natural reaction. Don't take this the wrong way and think I'm impaitent in waiting for you. Or that..i can't deal with the wait. That's not how it is. I will wait. I want you. And only you. And that's how it's going to be, nothing can change it, I'm waiting, for you.

guess I'll checkout and ditch this town- Mentally, i feel as if I have checked out, on certain days. Not all the time, but there are deffiantly days...where i feel as if i want to do nothing more, but lay in my room...and simply think..and let those thoughts just flutter about...and escape this town..escape this place...escape earth. To escape my human form, which limits me so. I want to spread my wings, I want to do what I want already. I'm restless. And the winter winds are setting in...which make me even more restless...because I have nothing to keep my mind focused on, except a few things. It's as if, my mind flourishes when I'm busy..maybe because...I don't have the time or space to think negative things? I want to leave this town...I want to be who I dream of being..I want show the world who I am, and who I can be. I want to be...free, in a sense.

Hangin' my hopes on highway signs
If I lie here, I'll loose my mind - It's as if..my hopes and dreams seem..futile, at times. As if, I can and hope and dream and wish all I please..but nothing will ever come of such actions. I know everything needs to get put into action, so I try to set them into motion..but am I really doing anything, or are my actions fruitless? And sometimes...I do feel as if I'm going to lose my mind. Then again, did I ever have full control of such a tool? Sometimes it's such a distraction, the way mull things over, the way i tick, rather. Sometimes my thoughts scream louder than I can shut out. And there's no such thing as mental plugs. So, instead, you learn to busy yourself with other such things, to try to drown out some of the thoughts..until they fade away...like a train sliding along the tracks..away from you...it's not as near you now..but you still know it's there...and you know what it holds.

And when the night falls in around me
And I don’t think I’ll make it through
Ill use your light to guide the way
Cuz all I think about is you- When night falls in..you're the last thing I think about before i drift off to sleep. You tend to cleanse my mind before I go off into my vunerable state of slumber. And you guide me....when I feel as if I'm about to break. You're always there. Even though you have your own things to worry about and think about...you always see me through. And I think God blessed me...when I met you.

I keep my head from getting lazy - I have to keep my mind busy sometimes...depending on the mood. Otherwise it wonders..and it twists and it twirls..sometimes spinning me right into the center of the blackest mood. But other times..I can allow my mind to wonder...to plunder on its own..But that's when I'm in a good state of mind already, and I know the deep, swelling sea of unhappy thoughts, is at low tide and I needn't worry 'bout them. It really depends on my mood, on what I allow myself to think about.

And all these days I spend away
Ill make up for this I swear
I need your love to hold me up
When it’s all to much to bear - I feel bad for being gone sometimes. For being..so busy at times. But i'm a teen..nothing I can really do about it, and not feel some remorse for leaving those activities. I have a quote on quote, "rock". They're always there for me, when I need them. Infact, I have a few. And i fall back onto them...when I feel as if the odds are stacked against me